Call it a taboo, label it polygamous, or dub it promiscuity, but it is not going away soon. It has been with us for ages and Mr. Mike Nwaorgu is given expression to a part of our being that has suffered undeniable rejection, with no one seeing it, feeling it, or fathoming a recompense for the victims.

And as long as the population of women continues to outstrip that of the men, and as long as most educated and uneducated men are finding it difficult to get a job or secure a sustainable means of income and settle down, women will continue to remain single and living single. The acceptance or rejection of Mr. Mike Nwaorgu's precedent is not going to be exclusively a men's call. The ladies must be directly involved. Because they are the ones who suffer untold deprivations: conjugal relation or the lack of it as well as procreation. In other words, it is the ladies who will make the final call on whether or not they want to be a second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth, or seventh wife. And they should have the right to make that choice. 

There is a video trending on WhatsApp of an Imo State lady, lamenting that Anambra, Enugu, and even Benin men have abandoned them. Adding that their beloved Imo State men are busy building hotels and acquiring wealth, but forgetting about marital life. In a similar vein, during the recent EndSARS protest in Benin City, one of the participants (a lady, to be precise), was on video, calling on her friends to join the protest and take advantage of it to hustle for (odor) a husband. To those of us who understand the Edo dialect, may want to laugh it off as comic relief. However, when you weigh the psychology of it, you will see a pattern, a social issue that is peculiar and tormenting the ladies and parents, but evading the public attention or interest.  

Why was it the most dominant thought in her mind in the midst of chaos and public safety concerns at that very moment? It is a parallel world. Their trouble is not our trouble. And we may never understand.

I remember a scene in the movie, "My Cousin Vinny" featuring Mr. Joe Pesci. Cousin Vinny was working round the clock, not only to set his cousin free from prison in Alabama, he was confronted with a hostile prosecutor, unfriendly witnesses, and a judge who had problems understanding his New York accent. And in the midst of all that headache, was his young pretty turbulent fiancee, played by Marisa Tomei, who was more interested in her biological clock ticking away, than the peace and serenity her fiance needed that night to concentrate on his legal reearch. So, the problem is global and it has been with us for ages. 

Please, I am not by any stretch of the imagination promoting polygamy or condemning it. It is a cultural issue in some jurisdictions and categorized as an abomination or a social taboo in some others. In this piece, I am simply reacting to an emerging trend that has defiled all the odds. Its metamorphosis is seemingly beyond repression in light of external influences. It cannot be subjected to legislative overhaul or man-made regulatory mechanisms.

Thanks to social media, we are in a world today, where victims of unintended deprivations or societal ills have a ready audience to present their frustrations. A new beginning where women may likely cast the first stone, in rebellion against illegality or social deprivations that circumscribed the expression of obscure impulses - the yearnings of the physical and the spiritual of our being. 

We cannot conclude the debate without weighing the benefits of monogamy or the ills of polygamy against women's inherent need or desire to be married and have children. Again, what were those societal ills that the abolition of polygamy was meant to address? Or was it simply Biblical or moral persuasion? Did anyone foresee the possibility of women outgrowing men in population or that most men will have difficulties settling down for marital life? Welcome to a new world where things may never be the same again and where old things continue to slide into oblivion without constraint. 

To be continued.  

Alex Aidaghese